Sex & The Spirit

Full moon rising over a sunset.

False Dichotomies

It always frustrates me to see the brain and the body framed as separate and opposite entities by the medical establishment. As if one can thrive while the other suffers. Then there’s the stigma against people who struggle with mental and emotional health. Insurance will cover treatment for a concussion, but it may not provide care for a chemical imbalance in the same organ. How are we ever supposed to feel whole?

Commonly held ideas of spirituality and sexuality are stuck in a similar false dichotomy. We’re told that one is in your mind, while the other in your pants, and never the two shall meet. It’s easy to blame purity culture for this view, especially in the US where it still does significant damage. But I believe it runs deeper than that. Even the dictionary defines spiritual in part as “incorporeal,” or in opposition to our physical form. This is totally at odds with my lived experience.

Spirituality is deeply personal. It’s not something we can really define for each other. Maybe you hold your faith in a particular deity, or in your connection to the Earth. Regardless, it’s about feeling like part of an energy system greater than ourselves that offers guidance and a sense of purpose. Meditation and prayer can serve as a direct connection to that higher power, and create a space for mindfulness and intention-setting, which (unsurprisingly) can even support our physical health.


Where the Two Intersect

Spiritual experiences can take place within the physical body, or bring you above and beyond it. Not unlike an orgasm! Sex heightens our sensitivity in every way, so we can share our love and energy with one another. Even solo sex transfers energy between your internal and external worlds. Sex and the spirit are driven by the same vehicle: the body. It’s why my heart feels most open when I meditate outside. It’s why my favorite pleasure products come from the Earth. It’s why I always bleed when the moon is full. It’s why certain types of touch can open emotional floodgates in me.

Like with sex, my spirituality is something I physically experience. Both fill me with awe and delight in being alive and possessing a body that can feel such beautiful things. They expand my sensory abilities and deepen my connections with other people, especially during sex. I know this is happening because I can sense it in my chakras and on my skin. Healing past traumas has taught me to never take these sensations for granted, and that they are essential to my quality of life.

You don’t have to be a “spiritual person” to be affected by sensual energies. They’re our life force! Think of how you feel powerful chemistry with a certain person, or how a particular smell can throw you back decades. Maybe you get blinding headaches when you ignore your intuition. This is your body’s way of guiding you through the world. Listen to it closely; it has so much to tell you.